Mental Health Day at Pigeon Point Light Station

“My successful Mental Health Day is having a Sunny Weather, listening to music, Nature Immersion and mindfully letting go of everything that caused me Mental and Emotional Distress. Guaranteed calm relaxation, positivity, happiness and hope.”

Mental Health Day is the only Holiday that focuses on the Person that needs it. It’s urgent as needed basis, from minutes to hours to days. It hardly cost a thing but means everything to the Individual that has to heal emotionally, mentally and physically. Our Work, our Society, People we know are not fully ready to understand what it means, but we are. So, we don’t deprive ourselves of that very thing that prevents us from losing it. We deserve to thrive, live, survive, even be happy.

Have you ever been where Place and Weather speaks and listens to the many versions of you from start to finish? Only you, no one else, undivided, full focused like you are the most important Person in this Planet?

Are we on the safe side or dangerous side? Are we the Free or are we the Trapped? Are we the Blessed or are we the ones Suffering? Metal Fence is just a fence. How we think and feel on either side symbolizes and defines its meaning. I would like to believe I’m on the Free side, but some days, it does feel I’m on the Trapped side. Inside,Outside Life situations changes all the time.

I have. Several times. Last was at Pigeon Point Light House. When Places, Weather and Moments speaks and listens to me, only for me, I put my guard down and surrender completely. Absolute trust.

I try to live in the moment because eventually all things that belongs to the World stays with the World. So why should I waste my remaining living years enslaving for the World and People? Aren’t we entitled to enjoy our lives too?

There is something sad yet irresistible about Nostalgia. That day, the Lighthouse revealed a part of its past that were both lonely and resilient. It waited and waited until it realized it can survive being alone and that Solitude is both it’s Lover and Best Friend.

Today, it shares that Solitude for free to anyone who seeks and wants it.

Downcast …how does it make you feel?

My moods can shift quickly from happy to sad to angry to mad furious just like the Weather can swiftly change from sunny to gloomy to rainy to stormy with freakin’ scary thunder and lightning.

The older I get, the harder it is for me to fake what I feel and what I think. Superficiality, Politics and Plasticity I can no longer tolerate. They bother me like I have Hives.

Even when it’s dark, even when the Weather is bad, or sad, or mad, it still is beautiful. We can’t really escape who we are just because our moods and emotions are having a moment.

Yep, my mood scares me sometimes. What if one day I can’t control it? What if the Demons and their Darkness are able to release themselves to the surface? What if they take over and I’m too exhausted to fight back? What then?

Bright, radiant, sunny, warm…how do you feel now?

If one wants to know how I truly feel, all they have to do is look at the Sky and the Weather. I can fake a smile, I can pretend to laugh but if the Sky has lost it’s Sun and Light, then what People see is a lie. A perfected functional lie. It’s how I have survived. It’s how many have survived. We understood in silence. We connect in silence. We listen in silence.

A minute ago.

I have to watch myself from myself all the time. What goes on from within can’t just be acted out anytime I want. I have to control myself and act professional around others no matter badly triggered. I can’t loose myself when I’m in charge of de-escalation, peace and order in a very busy workplace. Others can disrupt the work flow and vent whether irrational or legit, I can’t. Just is and will always be. Have to be the bigger, more mature Adult, though deep inside I’m just as childish and immature as anyone else.

A minute later, the Sky personality changed inspiring and motivating all things and life under it.

We got to Pigeon Point with the grey clouds completely covering the Sun. It was cold and windy. It wasn’t inviting. I was a bit disappointed because it was sunny when we passed by Santa Cruz for Ice Cream at Penny’s. We could have just stayed there instead of driving further. And Santa Cruz was having its kind of Beach and Boardwalk Fun when we left.

Depressing but not hopeless.
Good things happen to those who persevere.

In a matter of minutes, the Sun started to shine as the grey clouds started to drift away. In an instant, it’s like being in a different place experiencing a different moment, yet I only took a few steps away from the rocks.

Then Weather warmed up openly revealing incredible rock formations by the secret beach. It’s like being in another Planet.

The Sun is snapping everything out of their coma. Me included.

A huge rock hid one of the many secret beaches of Pescadero.

Low Tide revealed what normally the Sea keeps secretly to itself. The Sea was being vulnerable and generous.

Everyone was tired and sleepy when we reached Pigeon Point as we had to wake up early that morning for an Estate Sale adventure. We all took a nap inside the car at one of the parking lot of Pigeon Point. We pulled out the blankets from the trunk of the car and made ourselves comfy cozy. I lowered part of the car window to let the cool sea breeze in. It felt nice. 3 Amigos doze off.

So many Tide Pools with live mollusks, moving shells and anemones, corals, crabs, and tiny fishes. I was like a little child seeing the Sea for the first time.

I woke up earlier than the rest. I decided to get out of the car and enjoy Pigeon Point and it’s Nature Outdoors regardless of the Weather. I told myself, “I am already here where I want to be so I will make the most of it.” And so I did and much more.

They guard every Sea rock fortress by the beach from the outside World. Most of the time, they fail. Humans almost always wins.

I started by the field of wildflowers thru a broken wire fence. Was I suppose to cross? It didn’t matter. My instinct was faster than my common sense. I didn’t hesitate. I just jumped in.

View beyond the broken wire fence. This is how the Weather greeted me at first.

Then I proceeded to the stairway that leads to the beach. Weather keeps changing sunny to cloudy, cloudy to sunny, Sun on, Sun off. It’s like watching myself and my moods in the mirror, only Nature is crazy gorgeous and it’s mood swings even makes it more adorable. My mood swings makes me a Brat or a Jerk!

Fun Time. Climbing over the Rock Walls of the secret beaches. When the tides are high, the secret beaches disappear and is hidden by Sea Water. It was a rare opportunity to see them. So I walked the farthest safety will allow me.

A piece of a wood from a shipwreck so many years ago. The light from the lighthouse is suppose to warn the ships from danger, but sometimes Nature and Weather can cause disasters that crashes Man’s creations to pieces. Tragic but humbling.

Our Adventure has a second part with stories and reflections of their own. Weather and the Light Station decided to work together to surprise and awe. They made sure I have an amazing time being with them. They made sure I will share my experience with wonder and excitement. So here goes…

Above the beach overlooking Cabrillo Highway. I went past the metal wire to capture this view. No one was watching, so I walked towards the edge to check what’s below.

We have to seek our own version of beautiful. And some involves risk, danger and breaking the rules.

Many years ago, we didn’t know Pigeon Point exist. We were just driving to nowhere till we found our own somewhere that we totally fell in love with.

My Son was about 9 years old then. Our first visit was super fun and very exciting. Travel First Times are always special and unforgettable. Our succeeding visits felt like revisiting home. Pigeon Point became one of my favorite getaways when I needed to escape and recuperate.

The pink and purple flowers grows on the cliffs in Spring from April to May. It dies by Summer. Once a year, I try to go back just to see them.

Nature has so many seasonal miracles of life and colors, and I try to capture some for as long as I can. Every year is an opportunity to not miss out.

We don’t need a bucket list if we keep following what the heart wants.

Beauty and Happiness are subdued when the Sun is blocked. Exactly what the Heart feels when Weather looks like this. My moods and emotions are affected by the Weather. Sensitive much? The Sun is literally my Sunshine. And the Rain are my silent invincible tears washing, cleansing away all the pain, loneliness and heart breaks.

He waited for her but she never came back. This could have been where their Dream House would have stood. He never knew what really happened. Did she change her mind? Did something happened to the ship she traveled into. No matter heart broken, he wished she was well, safe and found love where she was happy.

As for the Man who waited, he decided to be the Lighthouse Keeper making sure everyone’s Loved One traveling by Sea gets to reach home safely. Perhaps, part of him still hopes his Great Love will show up one day at the Lighthouse doorsteps. She never showed up. What happened to her remained a mystery.

Everything and Everyone are more radiant and happy when love is added in the mix. Pictures don’t lie.

A vintage car was park outside the Hostel. My imagination time traveled again.

Across the Lighthouse is the Hostel. Yep, one can stay overnight or several days. Dream come true if I can stay here forever.

The balcony is an extension of the garden that overlooks the Ocean and another beach. Insane!

This is California, it’s beaches are ridiculously plenty, beautiful and wild.

Park Keeper closing the doors of one of the buildings. I smiled, and said, “Hey.” He smiled back and replied, “Hey.” I noticed few visitors still avoid eye contact when I passed them shoulder to shoulder. It has nothing to do with COVID any more since no one’s wearing a mask, me included. Unfriendly, prejudiced or just shy, it still makes me uncomfortable when People pretend other People don’t exist, so I pretend they don’t exist too in the same small shared space.

Sometimes, we have to let People realize how their body language and behavior affects others by mirroring exactly what they do back at them.

The white fences leads to the end part of the Light Station. Is there more beyond?

Yes, there’s more, and I save you the best view for last. This is the back part of the Lighthouse that watches the Pacific Ocean.

Every time I am here, it makes me dream that one day, this could be the place that I get to wake up everyday watching the Sunrise while drinking my morning coffee. This could be that place for my last breathe, for my last blog post. Hey, I could be the next Lighthouse Keeper, but this time I have my Great Love next to me. This could be that place where I get to meet and exchange stories with my Blogger Friends. Could be.

Blow Horn or Speaker, not sure.

There was once a staircase that reaches all the way to the edge. Don’t know what happened to it. Perhaps a storm destroyed it. Perhaps someone fell making it unsafe.

The other side of the Lighthouse with its own beach and adventures. I didn’t get to go down and discover its treasures. I ran out of time.

A family was eating by the picnic table at the backyard of the hostel. I could hear their laughter this far. So, I decided to go back to the car. My two Amigos just woke up. I asked them if they want to see the Lighthouse. Wife replied, “It’s 6:30, it’s getting late.” Son holding his belly added, “And I’m hungry.” I told them, “Yep, I’m hungry too. Okay, let’s have our favorite burger for dinner at Roadhouse.”

Old Friends don’t say goodbye. They don’t really leave because part of them stays with you always and part of you stays with them always.

Nostalgia, the Heart remembers moments and details of the past like they just happened yesterday. It’s a gift that no one can ever take away.

The band was playing Country. An old couple were slow dancing tender and lovingly. The Burger, dripping in deliciousness and flavor. We were happy and laughing. So much Good Positive Vibes in just several hours. It was the perfect Family and Me Day. Heaven on a Weekend.

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What COVID? Deception by Omission, Normal?

When asked if they have COVID symptoms, some Patients answer, “What COVID? I don’t have COVID.” Others would say, “No more mask. No more COVID.” Some self diagnosed themselves with certainty that it’s anything but COVID even if the symptoms are indistinguishable. Doctor sounds foolish when Doctor includes COVID as part of the possible Diagnosis. Common response, “I know I don’t have COVID, but okay, you can test me for COVID.” Then when Patient is notified of a positive COVID result, there’s this silent pause, followed by a tone of disbelief, then disappointment and at the end of conversation, acceptance.

Some do verbally express a rise of COVID in their area and wants to be sure they don’t have it thru PCR testing. Some are genuinely concern of not giving COVID to others if they are asymptomatic or just having mild symptoms.

Ocean Beach should be visible but it isn’t. Cliff House should be seen from this distance, but it can’t. The purple carpet flowers shouldn’t be blooming on sand without the rain, but they are.

Something is not right. Ominous dark clouds of COVID Outbreak is forming overhead and we can’t see it. We will be in the midst of a COVID Storm by the time we are informed. Then it’s survival of the fittest and the healthiest. People will panic. People will get angry. We shouldn’t passed 2 years of COVID.

Do we swim towards a possible shore that we can’t see knowing there’s something dangerous lurking beneath ? Do we swim when we don’t even know how to swim? Same with COVID and the Pandemic. Many assumed, many were assured they can swim their way through it however they want and drowned. Their names forgotten except those they touched.

I like to be updated via my XFINITY Cable T.V. News of what’s happening in my own City, County and the U.S. in general. I was shocked that XFINITY Cable News removed the COVID Pandemic update top section and kept only Politics and War on Ukraine. Why? Is COVID over? Is it controlled? Is there a reason Media and Government wants us to be off guard from the progression of present and future outbreaks? I don’t get it at all. Isn’t Public Health and Safety important? It’s the most careless and reckless COVID Attitude and Response I’ve observed since February 2020.

“No Mask, No COVID, Back to 2019 Normal Campaign” seems to be the overall goal to push for Endemic. It won’t work, not when COVID keeps finding ways to effectively infect People again and again. And Endemic means COVID is here forever, not because it ended. U.S. Leaders and Experts declared Endemic when it’s not time yet. They need to be made responsible and accountable for the victims of the next outbreak, the new hospitalized, the new daily deaths from misinformation or lack of information. Their hands are stained with the blood of those who were made to believe they are now safe from the highly evolving virus.

We need to go out there and discover for ourselves what’s really happening. The Good, bad, beautiful, ugly, loss, miracles, familiar, unusual, the important, the life saving. There are so many things our Social Media, T.V. News and our phone newsfeeds are not telling.

It’s flowers, beautiful. The plant looked harmless. Then it kept growing and climbing on the metal Fence. At first, the Fence enjoyed its beauty, warmth, company and all the attention it’s getting from the Passersby. Then one day, it discovered part of itself have been destroyed and eaten. Fence is now screaming for help before all of itself are gone, but no one can hear it. The Fence present and future is now owned by the beautiful, innocent looking parasite it allowed to grow and take over.

As the media coverage plunges down to an almost quiescence, COVID is gaining speed in numbers. It’s already ahead of the infection race. Can we catch up? Do we want to catch up? Some will try, some will not. This is Free Will in Real Life at Real Time.

Magic Purple Carpet of Spring is blooming along some parts of the Golden Gate Park. Some see them. Some don’t. Some appreciate them, some don’t. Some see Magic and Nature Art, others see weeds and annoyance, others don’t see at all.

How easily have we forgotten. I’m tired, frustrated and pissed off too, but these are not enough for me to have an amnesia. At least, not at this time when I’m still needed to help, to serve, to heal, to fight, to survive.

Humanity’s Battle against COVID is far from over. My Battle from COVID is far from being “Endemic,” and so with every Nurse, Doctor and Medical Professionals in the Frontlines of every new War against Sickness and Death. We don’t get to be impatient.

We took a walk along Ocean Beach before driving Home. We’ve been here so many times before but it was our first to notice it looking like this. Beyond the front houses, City of San Francisco looks like it vanished in thin air. Kind of like COVID. We think it vanished but it is still in the air. It is in People we interact everyday. We take it Home undetected. Just because we forgot, doesn’t mean it’s not there. Exactly why COVID keeps winning.

News Stations and Government can not just pick and choose their truth and select what information they want the Public to know. Omission is still a form of deception. It affects People’s ability to make safe informed decisions. We can’t prepare if we are not aware. We can’t choose when we do not know we are suppose to choose.

It’s Global Rise again. Travel, travel, travel? Fun, fun, fun? Sure, if that’s what we want. No one will stop us now. JHU COVID Data in Motion 5/6/22

What COVID? Joke, Sarcasm or Belief?

What happened to COVID? What happened to the Pandemic slashed “Now Endemic?” Do People realized there are new dominant COVID symptoms that no longer present with the typical respiratory and gastrointestinal flu? Symptoms are changing just like the virus DNA is changing.

The virus is now exponentially being passed around. Co-Workers to Co-Workers, Parents to their Kids, Children to their Parents, Grandkids to their Grandparents, Friends to Friends, Strangers to Strangers. Businesses and Economy will suffer once Employees gets COVID one after the other in a repetitive infection cycle loop. We will be short again of Manpower. This time, no more Government help because Endemic is no longer an emergency crisis.

No more free money. No work, no pay. No Business, Permanent Closure. Hospitals will demand payment of services from their Patients as Government COVID Funding ends. People will be in debt. Financial burden will make many lives miserable. Not everyone can afford insurance. Some have to pay out of pocket. Can you imagine how much weeks to months in I. C.U. care would cost? Hundred thousands of dollars. That in itself is horrifying.

A dense Fog rose rapidly from the Sea and swallowed Ocean Beach. Fog so thick that the Ocean can’t be seen from the road, and from the beach, the City seems to have disappeared. There is something off and odd to what’s happening. And my Gut feeling tells me it will be bad, really bad. But who I am? I’m just a bedside Healthcare Worker whose voice will only reach a few. I’m not famous. I’m not popular. I’m not the CEO. I’m not Elon Musk or the Kardashians. My opinion and observation will be subdued by the louder, more popular ones. Regardless, I will keep trying if there is a possibility that it can save one life.

Clinics and Emergency Rooms are seeing an increase in positivity but this time Patients are presenting with common Seasonal Allergic symptoms like nasal drip, nasal congestion, sore throat and cough with or without fever. Some presents with 1 isolated symptom like fever only, headache only, sore throat only. The loss of taste and smell are less common.

Average COVID daily Deaths in the U.S. is 340 per day, that’s about 124,100 average new COVID Deaths every year not including Surges. Acceptable? Just the Normal Mortality Rate of being Endemic? Answer should be No, but we settled because we are told to settle at these numbers.

We accepted that 340 deaths per day is better than having 2,000 deaths per day like the peak of last 2021-2022 Winter’s Surge. We agreed with a number that still involves Human Lives. We should strive for Zero like other countries in the World. But looks like Zero is an impossibility now. We’re past achieving Zero.

1,006 Americans died of COVID Thursday and Friday. That much in 2 days. It will just go up and down daily. It will not turn zero, not in a very long time. Influenza since it’s Pandemic long time ago has not stopped killing People year after year. Graph from JHU 5/6/22.

We decided to make a COVID Pandemic short cut for convenience, but like the Movie Final Destination, Death will come back and claim what’s his, if not in the first Million, then the next Million. There are consequences for skipping the finish line.

Top 3 Leading Cause of Death in the U.S. 2020, 2021 and 2022: Heart Disease, Cancer and COVID. And COVID long term complications can lead to more Death from Heart Disease and Cancer. Still mild? Still not a concern long term for all those that already got infected? Personally, I’m not worried of the now symptoms if I get COVID as I’m vaccinated, but I am worried of what it does to my body in 5-10 years now that I’m 51 with active Asthma, Borderline Pre-Diabetes and possibly Hypertensive. Our bodies deteriorates and degenerates with age. It’s expected Science, Anatomy and Physiology.

Everything and everyone goes downhill with aging even with aesthetic Plastic Surgeries and the healthiest lifestyle. On a cellular level, we can’t say a 20 year old body is the same as that a 40 year old. Immunity and Infection Defenses included.

Live fully now, tomorrow and the soon. Don’t postpone what we can do this Summer, this year. Living has never been more urgent. Chances of Dying has never been more clearer. World and Domestic Recent Events are the proof. What more signs do we need being the survivors of this Pandemic? We use wisely our Second Chance. Golden Gate Park 5/6/22
What Sea?

We need to question who are this real People that continues to die from COVID. Are they vaccinated, unvaccinated, middle age, young, elderlies, immunocompromised? What are the co-morbidities that makes the mild symptoms turn deadly? How come 30 percent or more of the dead are obese? How does being overweight increases my risk of getting serious COVID? I don’t have the answers when the answers stopped coming. I guess, I have to find out for myself. I may have to experience it myself.

Our Safety will be in Silent Mode and Secrecy.

Our Boss, Supervisor or Manager will not tell us that we have been exposed by a Co-Worker or a Patient. They will let us think we got it from the community. They don’t care if we are infecting our Family and Friends because we are unaware of our contact with a Person with COVID.

A good Friend and Co-Worker concerned of possibly infecting those she worked with called me to observe myself for the next few days as we were in close contact the last 4 days. She turned COVID positive last week. Our Boss is silent because of confidential health information legal policies. But a sick employee has the right to tell those she may have infected. It’s the right thing to do. Just like telling all of one’s partners once diagnosed with STD like HIV or Chlamydia.

I went over this side, while most just stayed at the entrance or center of the Garden. I wouldn’t have seen what I’ve seen if I wasn’t curious and unsatisfied. I knew there was something more. It was a secret garden visitors are not seeing. I think I was not suppose to enter it too. Oh, well…no one told me to get out.

Half of my Work Staff called out sick for more than a week, only one warned me and others who are not sick yet. Silence from my Co-Workers. Silence from my Boss. Silence from People I trusted as Friends. I’m suppose to just pretend this is normal when it’s the first time I’ve seen this ever happened in my entire Nursing Career. Normal, when this is the first time Pandemic infiltrated my Workplace making it unsafe for both Employees and Patients on a daily basis? Likely, this is happening across all Healthcare Facilities in America.

Another Co-Worker turned positive. Definitely, an Outbreak at Work that is being kept quiet. Paranoia won. I tested myself. Still COVID VIRGIN. Well, someone has to go back to work, but how about next week, or the week after, or next month? Survival of the Healthiest. Who would be the last Uninfected? We need to study their DNA.

For the Immunocompromised, the Elderlies with Co-Morbidities, be extra careful when at a clinic or hospital lobby or at a pharmacy because COVID sick now sits and stands next to non-COVID sick everywhere. It won’t be surprising to get COVID 5 days after seeing a Doctor or picking up your prescriptions. This would become normal and normal as time goes on. It’s the risk we have to take or forced to take achieving “Endemic,” and COVID Fatigue.

What Virus?

More recent important questions have risen up with the New Variants and which Population it is targeting. Yes, there is a target group but I will leave that to you to Research.

What is the common denominator among those who developed severe and lethal COVID? What is the guarantee we do not belong to that risk group?

America will surpass 1 million COVID Death mark this week. Should this be an important Public Health Safety News? Should preventative measures be a goal to slow down the next million of deaths from happening?

What People?

The 6th U.S. COVID Wave is here, and no one knows what’s happening or how big it can explode. No more surveillance. No one will be prepared when the Emergency Siren will be activated. We can’t be victims again of another Pandemic Fiasco of 2020 when our Government Leaders and Experts kept health and life saving information from us.

Just because we are at the bottom doesn’t mean we can’t see nor be the start of change that needs to happen. Power in numbers.
Don’t we all want to live longer, healthier to enjoy what makes us happy?

I told a close Co-Worker that we need to watch each other backs as slowly, one by one, we are getting COVID in our own workplace. It’s just a matter of time.

Mild, moderate, severe, however the symptoms, the point is COVID won. Our bodies are no longer ours to control. The virus can mutate inside our cells and DNA however it wants. Within 10 years, our bodies can develop chronic diseases, acute fatal to debilitating clotting diseases and cancer we shouldn’t have if we are living an active and healthy lifestyles. Long term sequelae, COVID manifestations may not be mild or asymptomatic.

My Mask hasn’t fully retired. Some places like Work requires it for my own protection and others.

2 weeks ago, wearing a regular mask I confirmed with an elderly female Patient reason for Doctor visit where she wrote, “Allergies.” She replied, “It’s Allergies,” then she stared having a series of dry cough. I told her, “Sorry to interrupt, I need to get something quick.” I then hurriedly went to wear my N95 mask and face shield. I returned to her room and proceeded with, “Sorry again. And what are the symptoms of your Allergies?” She then added, “Well, for 2 days I have this worsening cough and sore throat. My nose keeps dripping and congestion. And my right ear hurts.”

While Patient was telling me this, she kept removing her mask to cough and sneeze on a tissue paper. Thousands of infectious microscopic droplets were floating in the air, ready for its next Human Host. My PPE saved me, but I don’t know if the old Man with her was able to evade the airborne virus. Female Patient confirmed COVID positive the next day.

What City?

A week after, the old Man with her got COVID too, but his is worse with rapid progression to shortness of breath, likely Viral Pneumonia. He was told to go to the Emergency Room. Doctor was very worried because he doesn’t believe it’s serious. Will he survive? I don’t know. It is up for the Patient to decide whether to seek advance hospital critical care or not. 1-2 days longer may be too late. I remember the old Man’s face smiling and laughing when I told him to wear the mask always because he needs to be healthy to take care of his wife who was sick.


For a moment, I honestly believed the old Man will be spared from COVID because I’m told COVID is now harmless and so mild that I shouldn’t be worried for myself, for my Patients and Co-Workers. I’m told at work to treat it like it’s just Flu. I should have followed my Gut feeling and own personal observations. Even those I know are trying to omit information that will put me and others in harms way. Silence is an implied work FYI, and it is getting into my nerves because it’s like I’m suppose to both act smart and stupid in a work that involves People’s Health, Life, Comfort and Safety.

I take my Time, Moments and Memories seriously. I think my Son does too. Friday, he decided he needs a day off from School and have a me time recovering from an ankle sprain injury doing P.E. It doesn’t look broken but ankle is tender and he was limping last night, unless he was just adding some acting to the injury to be more convincing. I didn’t question his decision. I knew pretty well the importance behind it. He doesn’t have to explain why he needs it. I understand and totally get it.

They cut the Mother Tree. Many years after, a new Baby Tree grew on its remaining trunk base. It’s Hope, it’s Miracle, what else can they be?

Since Covid-19 vaccines became widely available, there has been a wide gap in deaths between the vaccinated and unvaccinated. But recent Covid deaths are much more evenly split as highly transmissible variants take hold, vaccine protection wanes and booster uptake stagnates. CNN 5/11/22

Moral lesson to an old story? Enjoy life while we can and spend more time with those we love. Be informed. Go out there and discover the truth we are being denied of. Follow your own gut feeling. Listen to your senses. Talk to Friends and Family in the Health Field. They won’t lie to you. Be prepared while also having fun. We could be both Smart and Adventurous. Stupid and a Fool? Well, it’s also an option too in a Free Country. I am one sometimes when totally unaware of the truth or just making very bad decisions.

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Love Defying Impossible, Star Fish and Sea Serpent

Their Worlds are different. Their Species are not suppose to co-exist. Falling in Love is an abomination. Falling in Love means betraying Family and Society. Fighting for Love means surrendering Life and choosing Death. It’s impossible.

Star Fish and Sea Serpent defied Society and Family to free themselves and find their own happiness not realizing they will meet at this spot in the Forbidden Land to find the most powerful and most beautiful of all treasures one could ever have…Love.
Why fences? Is it to protect us? Is it to emphasize ownership? Or is it protect others from danger? Is it an entrapment? Who is imprisoned? Who is truly free? Things means differently to different People. We are looking at the same view yet the view speaks to us however we need it to be at that given moment. All see a Beach surrounded by Nature. I see a story that connects to mine.

But the Heart what the Heart wants, and until it happens one doesn’t know who the Heart will Love.

This is the story of Star Fish, a Princess of the Star Fish Kingdom and Sea Serpent, a Prince of the Sea Serpent Kingdom. Star Fish has a gift to make everything around her bloom and flourish. She can turn barren land and seas into a fertile Oasis. She can will Nature to perform miracles. Sea Serpent has the power to bring light, healing and unification. He can influence all living creatures to do what is good, just and kind. He can’t however use his power for personal desires and interests.

Someone’s finger points and dictates how we should live our lives. It takes strength and courage to say No.

Both are blessed and cursed in their own Worlds. They are born Royalty destined to adhere to a strict path. Their greatness are carefully planned by the Monarchy and the Society it serves. They can be everything to anyone except themselves. They had to bury their wants to the deepest parts of their subconsciousness. Duty before Happiness. Self before others.

We should be able to see ourselves clearly and not slowly disappearing to become non-existent.

Star Fish and Sea Serpent are raised to please, to follow, to serve, to sacrifice, to fit into a mold and inspire everyone that needs them. Their choices are pre-destined and not their own. This is the norm. This is the expectation. This is their Culture. This is their Future. This is how everything works on both Kingdoms. No deviations. No exemptions. No special privileges and entitlement.

Some are destined to pursue a path different from the rest, but that path will be harder and more challenging than everyone else. Out of some, only a few will be determined enough to try. Of those who try, even fewer will be successful.

One day, the expectations were just too unbearable. Both had enough of living a Life that is not their own. They finally realized it is better to die than live a life of lies and emptiness. Both felt immense unhappiness and needed to escape. They knew they will die if they do not leave. It was the hardest, heaviest decision they ever had to make.

The hole keeps getting bigger, the void deeper. Never let unhappiness eat every good part of you. Never let People change the best parts of you. They will try till the end but end is up to us and the Stories thereafter.

So, one night, when everyone was asleep, both decided at the same time to leave everything to a place forbidden to everyone. Anyone that goes to this Forbidden Land gets disowned and ostracized. Their names disappear and their families forget them like they were never born at all. If caught, it’s Death by Lethal Poisoning. It was a risk they both were willing to take for freedom, for living, for purpose and for happiness even if they may be short lived.

It’s hard to let go of comforts. It is hard to start all over again with so many unknowns and unfamiliarity. But we will never know where our dreams will take us or who we will meet if we don’t try. Adventure is scary if we focus on the negativity, but it becomes an exciting journey if we focus on the positives. Adventure is not for all and that’s okay. We all have our choices and priorities to make. There’s really no wrong or right answers because every choice has a consequence and outcome. No escaping that.
Love is surrendering completely to all the unknowns with Faith, Trust and Hope.

And so, two strangers end up meeting in a place they were told as bad and evil. It turned out it was the best place they could ever be like it was just created for them.

They found in the Forbidden Land all they were deprived including the one they are not suppose to have…Love.

Carpet of green, yellow, pink, purple and orange surrounds the New Kingdom of Star Fish and Sea Serpent. Their Castle of rocks, limestones and granite sits on top of a cliff that has a 360 degrees majestic view of the land and water around it. It exist in Monastery Beach. It only reveals itself to People needing Love and Inspiration.

Days turned to weeks, months turned to years. Star Fish and Sea Serpent love blossomed and made their gifts even more powerful. Their purpose grew into many incredible greatness. Every void of unhappiness now overflows with joy and contentment. And all these, they get to share with everyone around them. Miracles were happening every minute. New Life Forms not seen elsewhere were being created everyday because of Love. It was spectacular.

They get to create their own World the moment their hearts met that has the best of everything under the Stars. They trusted completely their hearts on a new, strange feeling called Love.

In time, Star Fish and Sea Serpent built together a marvelous Kingdom by the Sea that shares all their strengths and hopes. It’s a Kingdom where anyone can equally dream and anyone can love whoever their heart chooses to Love. No limits to one’s dreams. Everyone is celebrated and valued. Everyone gets to experience kindness, compassion and understanding. It was the perfect World that only happens in Fairy Tales and Bedtime Stories.

To unreal but there it was, my Kingdom by the Sea. It was mine until it was time to say goodbye and go home.

One day, Sickness, Famine and War befell the Old Kingdoms where Star Fish and Sea Serpent grew up. Millions have died. The rest of the Living were driven off their lands. All their riches were burned to the ground or taken away. All of what’s left, the clothes on their backs. The two species wandered, more have died along the way. Those who made it learned to co-exist and help each other. It was the only way to survive.

Wildflowers are to be envied. They get the best views for free, and gloriously beautiful naked and simplest. They don’t worry about today’s sustenance nor tomorrows wealth and comfort. Complete trust to their Creator in Heaven.

Finally, the 2 Species reached the Kingdom of Star Fish and Sea Serpent. It was the most beautiful Kingdom they’ve ever seen. They were surprised to see everyone so happy helping each other regardless of their Species and Ethnicity. Some thought it was Acting until the goodness and kindness were extended to them unconditionally.

All are welcomed like Friends and Family. Their Past unquestioned and automatically erased. Each was given a second chance to create a Present and Future of their own choosing. What was impossible in the Old Kingdoms were real and generous in the New Kingdom.

I walked towards the other end of the beach, I can’t believe what I was missing for so long just because I was lazy and contented on the usual side of the beach that was convenient. More adventures happen to the curious.

Everyone was a Friend and Family to each other even if they all looked different, beautifully different. Everyone’s Heart, cared and knew respect. Everyone was equal. Everyone was authentic. Everyone has the same opportunity to transform into their most wonderful, happiest self.

It was Paradise for all. No Rich. No Poor. No Middle Income. No one is better than the other. All are experiencing better. All can have the best. The first of its kind anywhere across the Universe and Galaxies. The impossible was made possible.

It was a beautiful contrast and difference from the rest, but it didn’t feel that way because the rest made sure it will always feel different from everyone else. Real Planet. Will it ever changed?

On morning, wandering among the crowd were the Parents of Star Fish and Sea Serpent. It was Destiny that they will meet their Children to witness their amazing transformation and the incredible Kingdom they have built because of Love. They are destined to witness the change that needed to happen. They are destined to see Love that is unconditional, open, equal among different Species and Cultures. Humility brought them back to the Children they lost. Love brought them back to what they could have deprived themselves in their entire lifetime.

Beauty is everywhere, even the ones we step on.

The beginning of a New Dawn has began and from one Universe to the next, the Legacy of Star Fish and Sea Serpent liberated everyone imprisoned for centuries. The Universe and the Galaxies will keep the Love of Star Fish and Sea Serpent alive in each Living Creature that will follow their courage and example.

I was just there to enjoy the beach, hike and relax but Monastery Beach already has its own plan for me. It wanted me to see a World that is possible. It showed me a miracle that is possible.

Do we identify with Star Fish and Sea Serpent? Are we them? Or are we the Family and Friends making their lives hard and impossible? Are we the chains around their hearts and happiness? Or are we the cause why spectacular and brilliance exist?

Some days I am clear and vivid. Some days I’m the blurry background no one sees. In both, I am still me, more or less.
He saw part of what I’ve seen. One day, he will walk this beach too and it will open up to him with stories that his Heart will only know. He will see and experience his own version of the New Kingdom by the Sea.

Fiction? Real Life? Writings are not random made up things created by a very imaginative mind. Writings are subconscious thoughts, experiences and dreams, the forgotten and the suppressed. Writings are the wants and longings of the Mind and Heart. They are Angels and Demons trying to co-exist in harmony and peace.

Life without a fence. Doesn’t it look and feel better?

Writings are the mirror reflections of the Soul not readily visible nor acceptable in our everyday World and Society. Calling it Fiction feels safe. Treating it as Fiction drives away suspiciousness and attention. It’s Freedom itself trying to set as free from all that we need saving and escape.

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Nature Time Prescription for Depression

From 20 minutes to 2 Hours per day, Nature Time can now be prescribed by your Primary Care Physician to treat Depression.

I sum up my Nature Time to one day per week or every 2 weeks. I need to learn how to break them down to several short sessions every day or every other day because it’s more therapeutic that way. Just like taking medications, Nature Time should be daily to work its best. It needs to remain in our system so we don’t go rebound or have withdrawals.

For those that have been visiting Nature for healing and Wellness, this only confirms what we know and felt all along.

Close your eyes and pretend you are with me. Where hiking towards a hill carpeted by greens and wildflowers. The blue Ocean surrounds us and we can clearly hear it’s waves moving towards the shore. The Ocean breeze fresh, cool and gentle. Then we reached the top, the clouds reachable. Now open your eyes, welcome to my Oasis. It is now yours and can be any adventure and escape you want. It transforms however you want it. Enjoy.
Nature Time at Carmel Valley. Mental Health Getaway and Healing every time. It’s worth the 90 minutes drive though Scenic Nature and Ocean Drive along Cabrillo HWY is by itself a form of Therapy.

CNN Travel: In the US and Canada, doctors can prescribe “nature time,” including free passes to national parks. Dr. Melissa Lem explains why being outdoors in nature is so important to our health.

I don’t wait for others to save me. I try to save myself as long as I have the strength to do it. I don’t recommend Waiting and Assumption.

TIMES: Why Doctors Are Prescribing Nature Walks

The irony. My Primary Care Physician never mentioned it nor has any of the Doctors I have worked with to their Patients suffering from Depression. These are Family Medicine, Internal Medicine and Emergency Medicine Physicians. None from my 22 years of Nursing Practice.

All alone is when I’m most connected to Nature.

What normally happens, Primary Care Physicians based on a Depression Scoring System or simply from the Patients subjective need for Depression Treatment refer their Patients to a Behavioral Health Specialist like Psychiatrist both for medication prescription and Psychotherapy. Primary Care Physicians comfortable with prescribing Anti-Depressants can initiate and refill basic Anti-Depressant prescriptions like Sertraline. Still follow-up and trust are poor.

Some Medical Groups like Kaiser are aggressive in treating Depression and Mental Health at the Primary Care Physicians level which I believe should be the standard of wholistic Patient Care because no one knows more of our medical and psyche history than our Primary Care Physicians. Other Medical Groups, their Doctors are reluctant to deal with Depression upfront and will refer depressed Patients to a Behavioral Health Specialist delaying Patient Care. The when is the problem many Depressed Patients have to endure.

The closer the Nature details we see, the more Worldly things and problems we forget.

From Waiting to Nothing

Behavioral Health Referrals can get denied by their insurance as easy as having the wrong ICD Code Diagnosis. Follow-up and time of approval to appointment can take weeks to months, and many of these referrals fall off the cracks. Patients on the other hand are suffering or already been to the Emergency Room for severe Depression and or Suicide. Nothing has changed for the past 10 years to improve this inconsistencies.

Nature because it’s okay to by myself. Nature because all that I could ever want is almost free

Untreated Mental Health is alarmingly prevalent. It is very common yet it is not given the needed attention and urgency. Severe Depression and Suicide are considered Emergency. They are seriously Life threatening.

…Freedom and Adventure.
…Joy and Happiness.
…Peace, Calm, Contentment.

Bay Area, San Francisco and Santa Cruz has very high untreated Mental Health and Homeless Population. They are everywhere. Locals and Leaders seem to accept this as normal and hopelessly unfixable. It’s not. Something can be done. People should get the help and support every Human Being deserves.

True. Some will buy the 1 million house, destroy it and build brand new 2-4 townhouses at 2 million each. This is the unregulated housing trend in California. People even take pride in telling others how their community has become very unaffordable while omitting the fact homelessness, mental health crisis and drug addiction are also happening in the streets of the million dollars neighborhoods. Bubble Trouble.

How communities with 1 million and above houses ignore real People in their streets crying for help and change is unbelievable. But where I live and my surrounding Cities these is acceptable and tolerated. Eventually, new Settlers gets numb and accept things as futile.

People like to pick and choose. No one really likes the ugly part of anything, so selecting what’s beautiful is hope that the outcome will also be beautiful. Not really the case in everything. This is why we make big regrettable, heart breaking mistakes.

People look the other way. From our Governor to our Mayors, same reaction, look the other way. Focus is on Capitalism, Economy and Politics. Mention of Mental Health is Taboo and People act like it’s happening to another Country. Who would believe and accept Silicon Valley home to some of the richest companies and owners in the World like Facebook, Microsoft, Google, Netflix and Tesla has so much Poverty and ignored Mental Health Problems? It’s a scandal. It’s ugliness to an image that has to be dreamy. This I can tell you, it ain’t dreamy at all. But I got numb too and learned to accept things for what they are.

I know what calms me. I know what makes me happy even if they are fleeting. I know what makes my heart feel Alive. But what I want will never be easy. I always have to compromise to have them. Life is complicated when it could be simple.

I struggle with Anxiety, Stress and Depression myself so I know exactly what it feels to live in an environment where People are in a Bubble, Friends and Family included.

Bubble means things that are nice, pretty, happy, comfortable, amazing are the main focus of life and conversations. Anything negative, sad, painful, dark, conscience provoking, uncomfortable, requires caring are frowned upon and unpopular. They get skipped like they are not part of Living in the Real World. Superficial Bubble Mindset and Lifestyle.

This is what I learned in America and it’s obsession of having a Dream House, “That I would rather be free from misery and slavery, than having a nice house and be owned by a company for 15-30 years.” I chose to liberate myself and my Family in 2008. I chose to save me and follow the dreams I had set aside because of the irresistible influence of People and Society. I was very naive and stupid then.
To feel Alive takes hard work and patience. To let someone important we love feel Alive requires selflessness, kindness and understanding. We do not have to wait for their Doctor to prescribe Nature Time if we already know Nature makes them happy and hopeful. Love generously.

Next time we see our Primary Care Physician, ask for Nature Time Prescription. Summer is coming and so many Nature Parks awaits for us to experience. We deserve to smile and be happy the way Nature intended. If our PCP doesn’t know what Nature Time Rx is, time to educate them and tell them exactly what we really need. Not everything is fixed by Prescription Drugs.

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Burnout Nurses and Doctors, Then, Now and Indefinitely

Burnout is a Human Response to a chronically ignored Human Need, Stress, Frustrations and Work Trauma.

We also want to breathe free without a mask at Work but that may never happen if COVID cases happens everyday , 365 days a year. Infection Control Policies of Hospitals and Clinics precedes over all Nurses, Doctors, Healthcare Workers comfort and freedom. We can get fired for refusing the mask.

Burnout is a familiar experience for any Nurse and Doctor. The Past is full of them and the Now has even more. Tomorrow and Indefinitely, may get worse with the expected COVID Seasonal Outbreaks year after year.

No one truly advocates for Nurses than Nurses themselves. No one can fully understand and relate to what a Nurse has to endure than another Nurse who experience the same. How Nurses are treated is Universal. Nursing Abuse happens in both the Rich and Poor Countries. It’s a Profession that is needed but not respected as it should be. Correct me if I’m wrong.

Stanislaus County hospitals lose hundreds of nurses due to COVID-19 stress, union says – The Modesto Bee

This I can tell you as part of the Healthcare Workers Pool, that Nurses and Doctors are at the bottom priority of “all” Healthcare Facilities and Organizations. All, not some. None of them are without sin and blame. They just have excellent highly paid Lawyers that fixes things to disappear and create policies that are liability proof.

It’s always Money and Profits first, Administration and Management second, Patients third, Politics and Nepotism fourth, Spotless Public Image fifth, Employees, sixth. Yes, Work Force is the last however long the priorities and importance are. If not, then Stanford Nurses should not be on strike after being used in the worst times of the Pandemic.

Instead of Empathy, Nurses are being punished by their Employers for Advocating for better Work Conditions and better Pay in one of the most expensive Cities in the U.S. In response to the threat of a strike, the hospital said it would suspend health care for nurses who participate. -Mother Jones
My Son’s classmate told him, “My Mom is a Nurse and they are on Strike. Stanford will reduce her benefits so she joined.“ This is happening with Inflation and Difficult, Unsafe Work Conditions because of Understaffing. Every Patient should advocate for the Nurses the way Nurses advocated for them in time of need and care. They should because the quality of care they get depends on it. Ratio of 1 Nurse to 2-4 Patients is not the same compared to 1 Nurse to 6-8 Patients.

As I said before “Nurses and Doctors as Pandemic Heroes” was just a Propaganda both by the Government and Healthcare Companies because they need them to feel motivated. They can not afford to loose money and customers if Frontline Workers for fear of life and health quit or transfer departments or jobs that are less risky and less stressful. It was an effective lie until it wasn’t.

More than one-third consider themselves “not emotionally healthy,” according to a survey it conducted during the first few months of the pandemic, while 64% reported burnout and 37% said they planned to leave the profession within the year. – NJ Spotlight News

America needs more doctors and nurses to survive the next pandemic – Vox

How can we fix a problem where Administration and Management refuses to change and play Gods to their Employees. How can we encourage Employees to speak out when they are afraid of threats, retaliation, of being fired in a supposedly “equal opportunity,” and “Just Culture” workplace free of harassment and discrimination. We need to remember, CEO’s and Managers are only People, and People’s personal beliefs and attitude influence their work, thinking and decisions.
What goes around, comes around. Just a matter of time. No escape to the virus that thrives on Human Behavior and Lifestyle. We will all get it one day, Vaccinated or not, Young or Old. Everyone. Might as well enjoy life and pretend the virus is non-existent. Seriously!

When the Next Covid Wave Breaks, the US Won’t Be Able to Spot It. – WIRED

“Don’t care” the new normal. Why another Surge or Wave is guaranteed to happen? JetBlue flight attendant celebrated mid-flight, holding up her mask and chanting over the public address system, “Wave ’em in the air like you just don’t care.” – The Washington Post

Burnout can not be fixed by Money, Technology, Fakery or Trickery.

We can not Bandaid a Bullshit with a bigger crap.

We can not keep using People till they break down. It’s not healthy and safe to the Employee and their Customers.

Burnout Workers will give Customers substandard service that results to poor customer experience which translates to decrease dollar signs and bad review to the Company or Hospital a Worker represents.

Of the roughly one million Americans who have died from covid about 150,000 have been nursing home residents. One million US nursing home workers have also been infected by the virus and more than 2,000 have died because of it. – Quartz

Burnout Workers are prone to make mistakes that will jeopardize Patient Life and Safety. Accidentally killing a Patient have happened. Accidentally harming a Patient have happened. Most are kept from Public. Those who admitted their lethal mistakes will go to jail for Homicide while the Cause of the Workers Burnout gets away with it spotless.

What the RaDonda Vaught case says about our health care system. – Vishal Khetpal, SLATE

“If I’m a Patient and aware of what’s going on behind the scenes, do I want a Burnout Nurse and Doctor take care of me that may make a mistake?” Of course not. But as a Patient waiting for many hours in the Emergency Room to be seen and treated, I do not have a choice really. Same in a understaff Intensive Care Units and Medical Surgical Units.”

Guilty verdict for Tennessee nurse in case involving medical error has other nurses worried. – Blake Farmer, Marketplace

Understaffing takes away the Patient Right to be treated safely, timely, even kindly. And these are paying customers. Is that fair? Is that just? It that Humane?

The Pandemic clearly shows Doctors and Nurses need to be treated as Human Beings if we want them to last for the many COVID waves and surges of the Future. We can not exploit Professional Healthcare Workers long term, it’s not sustainable. Just like our Natural Resources, they can get depleted. The need for them will just increase whereas replacing them will only get less and challenging. It is already happening.

Personally, my Mental Health and Well Being will never be the same again after having to go through Work Related Traumatic Stress and the Pandemic. People outside Hospitals and Clinics may be rejoicing with normalcy and freedom, but not for those still inside their walls. The Pandemic became an everyday Endemic indefinitely with no rest and breaks.

What happens when Federal COVID funding for emergency staffing ends as U.S. is no longer Pandemic Mode? Thousands of patients in rural areas of the state might not get high quality medical care in the future if the number of out-of-state nurses practicing in Oregon continues to fall, according to a new study.– Oregon Capital Chronicle

America has a huge Healthcare Crisis and no one is fixing it right. It’s a Disease in itself and it doesn’t have a cure.

Today, I am a Nurse, Doctor and all Healthcare Workers Advocate. I hope I did not miss anything of everything you experienced and have to experience. We are not alone in our struggles. We do not allow Burnout, Stress and Maltreatment take away our Love and Passion for our Profession, our Patients, our Lives.

We don’t stop just because it’s difficult. There’s Hope and Justice, just slow. Very slow.

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Carmel Beach at Sunset

Even for a moment, to watch its Sunset will be worth the drive.”

Carmel Beach is one of my top beaches in Northern California with its beautiful blue waters and fine powdery white sands. It’s so vast that everyone gets to have a piece of calm and quiet.

We don’t need a house nor have millions to enjoy a water view. Anyone can have their own beach front anytime. We just need to pack up and leave when the Sun is gone.

Carmel Beach is a treasured Gem of Carmel-by-the-Sea.

Adventure Lifestyle is real. Not only it relaxes the mind, but makes the heart happier and younger. Anyone can achieve it if they want to. A school mate was found dead in her condo in Houston alone. May she be in Heaven now, but I hope she get to experience as many adventures and joyful experiences this World has to give before dying at 49. Living in the moment is not selfishness, it’s simply acknowledging at any time, our lives will be taken away. All that riches we worked so hard and gave our youth, we will leave all of them behind. All will remain what is Earthly.
Uniquely Carmel are it’s shape shifting Royal Cypress Trees. Amazing too are the changing Ocean colors from deep blue, to pastel blue to blue green to emerald green. Bluest is in the morning. All colors transitioning in one day.
Golden Hour of Carmel Beach is that time to make a wish. It is that time to believe there is a unforeseen miracle made for each one of us from the day we were born. Yes, we all are that special and should never forget our value.
Dinner, Clam Chowder in a can and left over Hawaiian Bun with Corned Beef. Wife can’t believe it’s all I want and got stressed at Safeway Food Deli trying to decide what I should eat. I said, “I’m just craving for canned Clam Chowder. It’s good and cheap.” She gave me a look, but saw later how serious I was when I started eating it like it’s so delicious. It was, just salty and cold. Honestly, with the Ocean View and the Sunset alone, I was already full. Food was just to satisfy physical hunger. A passerby stared at me eating chowder from the can inside the car. I didn’t care what he thinks. My senses were so delighted enjoying all the experiences all at once.

It’s a Dog friendly beach. It’s rolling waves are gentle, making it safer for small children to play along the shoreline.

Sometimes, one can spot Pod of Dolphins swimming and jumping above the water. To see them so close is an unforgettable exciting experience.

This Dolphins where from Clearwater. Monterey-Carmel Dolphins are much harder to capture on Camera. They are fast and appear randomly. Clearwater Dolphins appear close to the Pier close to Sunset and every Dolphin Watch Tug Boat Ride.
A Sunset becomes more when we want it to be more. Same with Life.

But most beautiful to witness is it’s perfect Sunset. It’s peaceful. It’s romantic. It’s a sign of hope to every Dreamer that tomorrow, they may bet to celebrate the fruition of their dreams under the Californian Sun.

I work evening. It is easier for me to catch a Sunset than a Sunrise. So, I’m working on seeing more Sunrise because I can not remember the last recent one. My memory keeps going back to Sunrise at Galveston Seawall that was so long time ago. It can’t be the last one.

We have a lifetime but we can count with our fingers how many Sunrise and Sunsets we appreciated and remembered. We see them everyday driving to and from work and still miss the magic and miracle unfolding before our eyes. Too sleepy. Too tired. Too busy. Too focused, Too worried of so many things. None is an excuse to not experience one of God’s most beautiful of creations. It’s Life. It’s Gold. It’s an enough to believe we are important in this World.

Carmel-by-the-Sea, unforgettable, charming and quaint coastal community. Its street is lined with stores, restaurants and inns.

Thank you all for the likes and comments. I appreciate them very much. I promise to catch up next week. All work till Tuesday. Yep, Vacay is often followed by long work week. But that’s okay. Got enough happy batteries to keep me going.

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Big Sur or Carmel side of Bixby Bridge, which is more Scenic?

On the Carmel side of Bixby Bridge along Coastal Highway 1, scenic view overlooks the Pacific Ocean and the grand Mountains of Big Sur. It is the Postcard Landmark for Tourists and Roadtrippers.

It’s hard to predict how this place will reveal itself. Some days it’s foggy and gloomy, creating drama and irresistible sadness. On a Sunny day with clear skies, the Heaven and the Ocean becomes a mirror of each other’s best. Radiant Positivity and Motivation shines everywhere. I see the most beautiful shades of blues that takes my breathe away every time. It’s the perfect Art and inspiration of Nature no camera can ever contain. Experience is personal and intimate.
This was 2020. No pandemic fear nor mandates stopped people from pursuing their adventures. Nature was their healing and escape. Still is.

Carmel side is often busy, hard to park, but more fun because of the visitors constant excited vibes and energy.

Weather is everything. Bixby Bridge is a totally different persona on a Foggy, Cloudy Day. Almost like an extension of one’s feeling. What we see, affects our mood. I don’t recommend this version when depressed.
If one drives further into the Fog, it’s zero visibility on the Ocean side.

Awe and amazement describes the feeling of watching in person the iconic scenery that graced the covers of many Travel Magazines and Social Media Feeds.

It’s unbelievable how Nature can be this beautiful. But there it is, and our Planet is full of them. This view is from one of the hiking trails of Garrapata State Park.

The popular side of Bixby Bridge is beautiful and rugged. It exudes adventure, romance and nostalgia. Doesn’t matter how many times one has been there. It captures one’s heart every visit, every moment. Kind of like visiting San Francisco and the Golden Gate. You end up leaving a piece of your heart because the experience and its memories made you fall in love with the place.

This view is further away from Bixby Bridge on the Carmel side. The soil ridges and rock formations are impressive. No specific address for this view, it’s a hit and miss discovery. So making several stops is recommended until one gets their perfect postcard pictures.
Beautiful doesn’t mean safe. Beautiful could be dangerous because it blinds the eyes even if the eyes have 20/20 vision. Beautiful also clouds one’s judgment and causes delirium. And I’m sure, we got blinded and went delirious because of beauty several times before. Adventure is a wise teacher, if we are ready and willing to learn.

The Big Sur side of Bixby Bridge, often less shared that overlooks the Carmel Valley and the Ocean is just as beautiful. It is different and uniquely charming on its own.

This view is way past Bixby Bridge on the Big Sur side. Carmel Valley will not be outdone in magnificence. Big Sur and Carmel are like Siblings, sharing the same genes that made them good looking standouts but they grew up independently strong and confident with stunning magnetic personalities of their own.

The other side surprises with a scenic view that is gorgeous, uninhibited, powerful.

Adventures that made me brave. Adventures that made me feel invincible. Adventures that made me fly and soar above troubles fearless. So I go back every time I needed an Adventure to remind me that I can be anything my heart wants, a Survivor. It’s easy to be lost in this World. Having a focus and purpose are important. Every Dreamer needs a safety net when they fall. Every Giver needs a Good Friend to be there when they get heart broken. Nature is our Friend that never betrays.

There’s this small patch of raised land immediately after the Bridge on the Big Sur side that is almost unknown and hidden to tourists.

Park at your own risk.

Parking is very narrow, possibly 2 cars the most. Dangerous blind spots on both ends of the sharp curve of the highway. Impatient Drivers do speed up reckless in these areas.

Climb at your own risk. 4/2022

If I want Solitude with a majestic view, this is one of my favorite spots to visit. It doesn’t have a name nor specific map instructions. It’s just one of those places one stumble by accident.

Same place, different year. I took my Son first year of the Pandemic so he can see what I see, experience what I experience. We were both being careful of the dangers. No excuse from falling for the sake of pictures.

I’m off the grid, until another curious Adventurer discovers it. That is my queue to leave. Threes a crowd, literally.

He did what I was scared to do.

The land on top is too small and I don’t know how much weight it can sustain. Strong winds can easily toss people making selfies and the soft ground beneath can gave way swallowing the person whole. So, mindfulness and cautiousness of the possible dangers are important visiting this side of Bixby.

This close is the most alive. This close is the most intense. That day, 20 mph winds made me quickly touch the ground for balance. I felt the wind pushing me towards the end and my legs were trembling, so I stopped. Fear is a good thing if it meant to save one’s life. This climb I was alone. Son and Wife stayed in the car.

There are also many tree root loops that easily will trap one’s feet possibly causing a lethal dive into the ravine . Visual Safety Inspection is wise before taking pictures. Walk slowly, no running. No pushing. Always safety first.

Nature continues to give all its Heart. May we take care of it like it take care of us…with Love.
The root also turned into a fence and held together the soil. Nature continues to protect Humans who are so in a hurry to destroy it.

So, which side is more scenic? Honestly, I like them both. Gives me different visual stimulus and perspective. I crave variety and newness some days, and familiarity and comfort in other days. Whatever my mood and desires wishes, Carmel and Big Sur never fails to surprise me with its beauty, kindness and generosity. They spoil me with so much inspiration and adventures. For that, I’m always thankful and humbled.

Life is good. It truly is. Till our next adventure.

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Blessed are the Restless

Blessed are the Restless for they will always find adventures.

Rediscovering Monterey. Our senses were having so much fun like it was our first, from visual, to taste, to touch, to experience of different moments and sensations. It’s incredible when we are open to travel adventures that are close to home and those we already visited. I’m so grateful that I listened to my restless heart and that my Wife and Son supported me on my curiosity and longings. It was more than just a 2 day vacation for me. It was escape, discovery, sanity and survival. It was kindness to self.
2015 Roadtrip, Sandbar and Grill was full and we missed tasting the reason why there was a long line and wait.
The fuss is all true. We asked our Son to choose where to eat lunch at Old Monterey Wharf. He chose exactly what we had in mind 7 years ago.
The best Clam Chowder, even better than the famous Sam’s Chowder at Halfmoon Bay. The Calamari, fresh, meaty, soft. The Mussels, buttery with just the right amount of sea salt, tomatoes and lemon. These were just the Appetizers and our mouths were already having a feast of flavors and textures. Definitely, delicious food is a top reason to go back to Monterey.
Alcohol makes the dream closer. Wife after her Vodka said, “Let’s move to Monterey. You did want to live close to Carmel.” I replied, “Yes, but perhaps in the future.” By future I meant, like in a very long time. Perhaps, close to retirement.

Blessed are the Restless for they always appreciate peace and calmness when it happens.

Del Monte Beach, pristine and safe. Kids can get close to the water and Parents can really relax.

Blessed are the Restless because they will treasure love and forgiveness like Life itself.

Blessed are the Restless for their boredom will be swift and their lives interesting till they are old and grey.

He is almost as tall as me now. He used to climb the Pier’s wooden fence to see the water below. Our love for the Ocean has not change. Many of our happiest Family Memories were at the beach. Our Restless Heart often bring us to the Ocean. It feels like home every time. Old Fisherman’s Wharf, Monterey 4/13/22.

Blessed are the Restless because they will always venture on their curiosity promising many days of discovery and creativity.

Always best to travel weekdays. Less crowd, Cheaper Hotels.

Blessed are the Restless because their Hearts will always dream no matter how many dreams have failed or how many times their Hearts got broken.

Monterey has most of the fun activities and dine places plus the beaches, Pacific Grove, mostly just the beaches. Farthest exploration for me is Seal Cove, then it’s Carmel and Big Sur time. So much can be done in 2 days.
Seal Cove Pacific Grove.
Baby Seal staring back at me.

Blessed are the Restless because they value the smallest, simplest, even the most ordinary of Joy and Happiness.

Retired Boat at a parking lot at Moss Landing.
We stayed at Moss Landing Inn. It was next to a cemetery, the old town and the beach. Basically, we were walking distance to adventure. Everything clean and new. The bed was comfy, the pillows and comforters soft. Best 2 nights of sleep for me which was bad news to Wife and Son. They both did not sleep well because of my loud snoring. So I let them sleep extra while I did my morning walks.
Coffee by the Beach, the best! Inn has this amazing coffee machine that makes triple expressos, cappuccinos, lattes and hot chocolate. It’s a Coffee Lovers dream machine. I can skip breakfast but I can’t skip my caffeine.
The slow, gentle waves caressed my anxious and stressed body, mind and heart. For an hour, calmness and peace. I didn’t have to drift away, I was one with everything around me. I was fully awake and aware. Everything was clear and vivid. I was content and blessed.
Solitude wave after wave.

Blessed are the Restless because they are always grateful for what they have and what they don’t have.

A Lady Bug landed on my Hoodie. It kept me company for a while at the beach. When it got bored, it flew away. And I thought I was being an interesting companion.
I wasn’t the only Restless that morning. Surfers were already there early enjoying what makes them calm and happy. There was a guy just sitting on the sand with eyes close quiet and still.

Blessed are the Restless because they will always see Hope even in their most unfortunate circumstances. And where Hope dies, important Life Lessons are born.

House Boat at Moose Landing Harbor. A Rooster stands on the deck. Live where we are happy and where we are close to everything we enjoy. A House can be anything and anywhere we want. We don’t have to follow other people’s dreams. What makes them happy may be something that will only bring us problems and misery.
Routine or Adventure? Stay or Explore? Discover or Stagnation ? Numb or Alive. Our choices will make a big difference in its outcomes.

Blessed are the Restless for they will always find a Friend, even a Community of Restless Souls wherever they go and wherever their stories will reached. This guarantees that all Restless will never be alone for as long as they keep their Hearts open to welcome other Restless Souls.

Moss Landing kept its past. An Old Post Office still stands.
An old West Store.

“Restless of the same Feather will always comfort and support each other, whether Strangers or Family.”

Trust, Honesty, Safety, Kindness, Well Being, Quality of Life and Education, Job Security, Lifestyle, Outdoors and Nature. Everyone has their criteria of Best Place to Live. Choose a criteria that is all about you and your Family.

I’m a Restless and I am proud of who I am. I will not change just because it’s more anxiety provoking, stressful, challenging, not popular nor unacceptable among the many Circles of Society. If I can’t accept who I am, then I will just be like the Hypocrites I dislike. Easy is not part of being Restless.

Restless, Beautiful and Authentic. No need to hide anymore. Let the rust and dirt show together with what sparkles and dazzles.
Traveling is the Night in Shining Armor, it saves those that needs to be saved by taking them exactly where their hearts need to be.

It’s Easter. We are suppose to be cleansed and be renewed in our Faith. So, why we can not stop wearing the Mask and the Fake Skin we despise so much? We can shed them. We can get rid of them. We don’t have to feel uncomfortable, shamed or hurt anymore. We can wear who we are. We can shine being who we are. We can be happy embracing who we are. Restless and Authentic, why not? The World needs more of us more than ever.

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17-Mile Drive Pebble Beach $11.25 Entrance Fee, worth it?

$20 Million Oceanfront Mansions lines up the 17-Mile Drive of Pebble Beach California. Some even more. Will I pay an entrance fee to see them? No. My Son calls it, “Making the Rich richer scheme,” and I agree. But would I pay to experience its beautiful well cared beaches and surrounding Nature? Yes, without second thoughts on Capitalism. At this point, I would like to believe it is a steal deal to preserve and protect Nature for future generations to enjoy.

The Lone Cypress. It’s the most expensive and most guarded Cypress Tree in the World. It’s not really alone, visitors keep it company all day long at a safe distance. It made a choice to grow and survive alone on a rock facing the Ocean long time ago. Is it happy? Does it feel special? Has isolation from everyone made it resilient and at peace? I don’t know, we are not allowed to talk to the Lone Cypress. It is however a vision of beauty, envy and inspiration.
There is something extraordinary when we get to see the smallest of details unrecognizable to the naked eye of most. That in itself is a gift.
No one’s watching, so we jumped over the fence. We had to see what it looks like to be on the other side. And the other side was magnificent. There are details of the landscape that are not included in the $11.25 entrance fee. One has to be bold to take a risk to see it. We’re just lucky. It was close to Sunset. No Golfers and Security around.
It’s like Nature was paid to paint this. Colors of pink, yellows, green, beige and blue. I was not sure if they were wild flowers or just a work of a very good landscaper.
Tiger Woods gets to play here. But so can anyone if you are a Member or Resort Guest. Interested?

Golf Course of the Rich and Famous extend close to the Ocean, the views too distracting I don’t know how Golfers can seriously pay attention to the Golf Ball.

Towards Point Joe that is next to the Restless Sea.
These trees are the Ballerinas of the Monterey Peninsula. They follow the music of the wind. Long time ago, they dance for free. Then Men came to placed a price tag on them. Once they were free as they were created by God, then People came and played Gods. It’s just how the World works.
Carmel Beach along Carmel-by-the-Sea is free and also beautiful but Pebble Beach is wildly untamed and crazy gorgeous. So yes, I’ll pay to enter it’s World of Wonders.

At 1% tax, $20 Million Houses yearly tax is $200,000 which is way above any middle income salary to afford a piece of Paradise. So, the only way to enjoy the beaches of the Rich with its sugary fine white sands, turquoise waters and unique rock and pebble formations is to pay an entrance fee of $11.25. Is it worth it? For a Nature Lover and Beach Lover, it is.

Wife and I walked for a few minutes. It was also a very romantic place with the Sun’s golden rays glowing with warmth on every surface it reached.

We visited 17-Mile Drive at Pebble Beach last year. It links the 3 Coastal Cities of Monterey, Carmel and Pacific Grove creating its own zip code and community. Pebble Beach California History is just as amazing and glorious as its Nature Ocean views.

His tower. He was going for functionality with multiple dwellings to max out precious space. The higher, the more it can accommodate Californians who can’t afford the lowest single family houses in the market.
My Tower. I was going for artistic design and architecture that extends to Nature. In my dreams, it happens.

Why the name Pebble Beach? For obvious reason, the pebbles. They are everywhere but Spanish Bay is where visitors make towers of pebbles. It’s a fun activity that takes one’s mind away from the World and it’s many stresses. One can make Cities out of them.

Father and Son moment. Everything was perfect.
Our Twin Towers that will house Families from all over the World.

“Despite of the map and short cut instructions towards Pebble Beach, we got lost a few times. We started at the end and drove towards the beginning, then back. Perhaps it was meant to be. The experience was different and exciting, like it was our first time to be there. Same place, new moments. It was both a surprise and an adventure.

17-Miles of relaxation, Sun, surf, and fun is worth every cent. It’s a giveaway deal that I hope to experience again this Summer. This time I will set up our tent and picnic griller to enjoy the Paradise of the Rich just a bit longer.

Appreciate the details that many are too busy to see. Be thankful for time and people that made our happiness possible even if it only lasted for several hours to few days. Vacay is vacay. Blessing is blessing.

Have a blessed holy weekend to all. God is good and loves us all. Thank you for sharing your time, thoughts, kindness and adventures. Together, we created our own zip code and community in Word Press Blog. It’s number and name only our heart knows. It’s location? It constantly moves where our dreams wants to go.

These are my dreams and I’m sharing them with you. We don’t have to be rich to dream this beautiful. We don’t need a full basket to start sharing our blessings. God will take care of the humble and the generous.

“Blessed are the poor in Spirit for they shall inherit both Heaven and Earth.” God is correct.

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1 Million U.S. COVID Deaths in 28 days

U.S. will reached its first 1 Million Dead within 28 days from COVID. It’s tragic that one country has reached this Death Stratosphere from 1 virus in 2 years and 2 months despite of billions spent on Science, Technology and Manpower.

Next to our hotel was a cemetery. I entered its gates and walked around. It was very peaceful. I looked at the pictures of the Dead, many are in their 40’s and 50’s. Some have personal things on them left by the living. One can sense who’s well loved and who was forgotten. But I’m sure once they were important to someone.

We did our best and still continue to loose People everyday. Today, we grieve for what was lost. Today, we acknowledge our own personal experiences with the Pandemic. We think we are not affected, but we are. All that bottled emotions for the past 2 years, it needs to reconcile. Let it go, let it go. We need to forgive and be forgiven. We need to be free.

So we grieve. We don’t skip the healing process. We don’t jump from denial to back to normal when the viral infection continues to claim lives everyday.

They were someone’s Grandpa, Husband, Father, Brother.

America Needs to Grieve 1 Million COVID Losses – Atlantic

Daily, average of 500 Americans die of COVID. U.S. Census ranked COVID as top 3 causes of Death in America together with Heart Disease and Cancer 2019-2020 and 2020-2021. How we allowed the virus to dominate the big leagues of Death is very disturbing not only because it’s preventable but because many of us are no longer concerned of being sick and infected with it. It’s a willingly ignored health crisis.

They were someone’s Grandma, Wife, Mother, Sister.

“It’s okay to get COVID because symptoms are mild,” mindset is spreading as fast as BA.2. It’s a high risk thinking. No matter mild or asymptomatic, the virus affects our DNA forcing it to mutate to other forms of diseases long term. So, really, it’s never okay to get COVID. Our DNA is unique from one another and will behave uniquely when paired with the virus DNA.

Love till the end. They died just few weeks apart because no point of living when one’s life and heart are gone. We’ve seen this in our Grandparents. Some have seen it among their Parents. Some Love are meant “till death do us part,” while others, as long as we’re happy.

If People try to stay healthy and make lifestyle changes to avoid Heart Attack and Cancer, should we do the same for COVID? It seems like the sensible thing to do. Annual Preventative Care will include COVID Vaccination, and this has nothing to do with the Political beliefs of our Primary Care Physicians. It will be offered together with Shingles Vaccine, Pneumonia Vaccine and Flu Vaccine.

She was someone’s Friend. She was a Nurse until she became a Patient. Healthcare Workers easily forget they too can die anytime. Death is real for them just as it was real for the Patients who did not make it under their care. God himself said, “You’ll never know the time I will visit you.

“No one wanted to die but they all died anyways, one or more every second.”

China, where it all began. It’s their second total lockdown. We are watching it like it could not happen here…again. Why is China so aggressive? Is there a new mutation much worse than we previously seen? We’ll find out in the next several months. COVID can not be contained, it will run its course Globally via Traveling. It’s foolish to think COVID takes a vacation when we’re on a vacation.

Anyways, I’m personally declaring April as International COVID Awareness Month to remember and grieve the lives lost from COVID.

We can only try to make every moment count.

Awareness includes recognizing People from around the World still struggling and suffering physically, mentally, emotionally and financially with the realness of this Deadly, Crippling Infectious Disease.

Do we even know it’s Easter this Sunday, the 17th? Is it something that we still practice? Has our Faith Reopened or still in Lockdown? Mine’s in between. Can’t really pretend I’m religious. I am struggling with my Faith. I’m struggling with what I was taught and what I personally experienced. It’s not Heaven on Earth for sure.

Future COVID Surges will be called collectively as “Whatever Surges.” This to me is acceptance of defeat and allowing ourselves to be infected with apathy. “Whatever Surges” will still affect and harm real People. And those People includes, you and me. We are not just “Whatever.”

Nothing beautiful last forever. Everyone has an expiration date. Unlike the Wildflowers that are reborn in Spring and dies in Winter, year after year, we remain Dead once we die.

COVID will surpass everyone’s lifetime because it is being genuinely true to its Nature. It is a Parasitic Killing Organism that mutates with its host DNA so it can effectively eradicate and disable as many as it can, for as long as it can one continent to the next, one country to the next.

ABC News, COVID-19 cases rise in largest US county due to BA.2 variant. What happens in LA normally spreads from Southern Cali to Northern Cali. Major Cities first, then Rural Communities. It’s a pattern and will not deviate. The last few days, my Family and I no longer wear mask when we enter the stores. Is it for good? We’ll see. Am I comfortable? Yes. If my instincts tells me to wear mask again, then I will. For now, I get to breathe as normal as I can.

How Lethal is COVID to Americans? For every 6 People that will die of COVID from all over the World, 1 will be an American. Perhaps in time, the ratio will widen, but for now, it is very clear which Country has the most Citizens eradicated by the virus. A truth many refuse to see. Why? There was a 19% increased in American Deaths unheard of in the last 100 years. Coincidence or Intentional? Planned or Natural? Victims or Survivors?

“Back to Normal Phenomenon” is happening all over the World except China. In the U.S., we had a COVID outbreak in The Capitol but Leaders are saying it is less important than other issues like Inflation, Recession and the War. This is NOT NORMAL, nor less important issue. We are no longer living in a normal World with COVID. Many are still in a “Denial Bubble.” And they don’t get to grieve until it burst.

Public Safety should be everyone’s responsibility and concern.

Cobwebs on a broken, rusty chair. Still, it’s entirety is beautiful and irresistible. Kind of like every Person, still very beautiful no matter rusty, broken and densely covered with cobwebs.

As an American, I need to do my part. Being quiet because it’s safe and comfortable will not save another life nor save mine and those I love. Being passive will not help me and my community in the future “Whatever Surges” as a Front Line Health Worker.

Wishing everyone a meaningful Easter. May we find some rest. May we find words of comfort. May we get to feel reborn, cleansed, forgiven. May we get to appreciate time and moments.

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If I Have Today

If I have today, where would I want to be?

To all the People that loved me and I loved back, if it’s the last day, I wish that all at once I will have you all beside me. It would be my happiest day as if time never passed and People haven’t changed. My Heart will be finally still and content because all that I ever wanted are now with me.

If I have today, whom should I spend my last hours, minutes, seconds?

In the end, it’s all about Family. Everything else are just distractions to what we always knew as important in our hearts and memories. I look at this picture and I could feel my Son’s arm behind my back and his head resting on my arm as we watched our last Sunset at Clearwater. The moments of our Family Adventures turns to life every time I needed them. I remember what gives me reasons to smile. I remember what inspires me to not forget.

If I have today, who should I say, “I’m so sorry,” to ask forgiveness?

To my Mom and Dad. Never a day my heart has not ached for missing time and opportunity that we could have spent together. I am sorry, and I’m sorry everyday. I wish things could have turned differently and our destinies kinder and merciful. I never wanted our stories and relationships to end the way it did. We all don’t deserve it. No one deserves it. I’m terrified and scared to try and take a chance. Why? Should I be? Did I create my own Wall so I can not get through or was the Wall a way to protect my mind and heart from what’s left of it. I don’t think I can survive another heart breaking rejection. I am not as tough as I used to be.

If I have today, who does my heart long to say my last “I Love You.”

To Love is both a blessing and a curse. It will always be a fusion of joy and pain, everything and longing. I followed my love for my dreams, in exchange, I had to leave all that inspired me to believe that my dreams are meant to go far beyond what I can see. No such thing as complete happiness when happiness are pieces of all that is precious, beautiful and irreplaceable. Some pieces are with me, others away from me. The only time they come together in perfect harmony and peace is when I close my eyes. On my last day I wish to say, “I Love You,” to my Mom. She gave me life, my first breathe, nourishment and care to be strong and be ready to be an adult. I offer my last words of love as I breathe my last. It’s only right. Circle of my Life has come full circle.

If I have today, who do I want to hug and hold in my arms for the last time?

The sweetest and hardest hugs are the ones that are the farthest. Distance is cruel. Destiny leaves a void. My last hugs are for those I love but haven’t shown physical affection for many years. I imagine stepping foot on a my Parent’s Balcony, then opening the front door that is never locked unless it’s time to sleep. At the living room, the lights are dimmed except the dining table where my Dad is eating, then my Mom enters from the Kitchen holding a newly cooked Adobo. They didn’t notice I’m watching them silently frozen. My heart is pounding. My chest feels like exploding. No matter how I tried to hold back my tears, they just started falling. Then the hugs. At that point, the past and all its pain drifted like it never existed. I’m Home. I’m at peace. But for how long?
My happiness is as easy as having To Go burger with my family overlooking a free million dollar Ocean view. I have learned to take time doing what I enjoy, try to relax and take care of myself, though it makes me feel guilty sometimes. I grew up in a mindset that self sacrifice for Family is both love and obligation. To pursue one’s happiness is consider being selfish. West and East Culture and Influence can be very conflicting.

It’s the end of World. Everything we devoted our time suddenly become insignificant. We drop everything we’re doing. The most important thing we must do suddenly becomes crystal clear and we pray we make it in time to do it, say it, be with.

One day, I would like to sit by a porch overlooking the Ocean or the Mountains waiting for the Sunrise and the Sunset. No more worries. Just life being good and not in a hurry.

Some die suddenly, some gets a chance for one more Birthday. Others have few months to many years. No one knows when is ours, but we can hope that we get to appreciate the preciousness and fleetingness of Life and Time just before Death takes what’s his. We can hope we’ve lived our lives exactly how we want it, and not feel cheated.

My Birthday celebration started the day after my actual B-day. We drove to Davenport to fix two cravings, Food and Nature. First stop, Davenport Roadhouse.
Food were bursting in flavors. How I can taste literally the grilled smoke of a medium rare Steak was amazing. The Philly Rib Eye, Oh, La, La! I saw my Son bite the medium cooked Burger and the juices dripped down to his plate. I asked, “Are you happy with your Burger. He replied, “Yes.” I did promise him good food as an incentive to go Hiking with me. Bribe? It worked.
It’s not really true that money can’t buy happiness. It can by vacations, it can buy 6.59/gallon gas for road trips, it can buy food, all can lead to possible happy experiences and moments. Money is not evil in itself. We do need money to live comfortably. Why we work is exactly to have money to pay for our wants, needs and desires. Happiness no matter short is still happiness, and I’m grateful for that.

My Life, I work 5 days a week, 2 days of rest and catching up on time however I want. This is my routine and cycle since I joined the Nursing Work Pool in America at 31. everything was planned and scheduled that repeats week per week, year per year. Every pay period, I get free vacation hours that accumulates enough to extend rest and fun days to 1-2 weeks few times a year. This extended vacation hours means so much to me because it’s more time with Family and to myself. It is extra time to enjoy life, heal, reevaluate my purpose. They are my priced Mental and Emotional Health Days. They are as important as breathing air to survive. They are my batteries so I can continue to give, serve, function, smile, be a ray of positivity and sunshine above 100% performance from clock in to clock out.

I finished the Philly Rib Eye. It was a big serving. I don’t normally eat that much. So time to hike and burn those calories. I was having reflux.
Anywhere along Highway 1 are beaches. Choosing can be confusing. I decided to hike towards the concrete swing by the beach. It’s of what’s left of a pier long time ago. Why it’s there is a mystery when it is challengingly steep to go down for up close experience.

“It’s easy to forget that we are not born to live forever. It’s easy to forget all things eventually end and cease to exist. It’s easy to forget we get old, wrinkled and that our Brain Cells do die everyday losing memories that once were dear. It’s easy to forget we are God’s creation with a purpose and not acting God defying or ignoring our purpose.”

Some places we go, beautiful patches of wild blooms grows from the pieces of ourselves we left behind as flower seeds.
20 miles per hour wind made it harder to go down the beach. I skipped it for next time. Son warned me not to. He was being smart and cautious.

Today is the day I was born 51 years ago. Now, that feels so very long time ago. I’m old and will just get older. No denying that worrisome truth. Worry because honestly, I’m concerned of being old when I still have so many youthful dreams I wanted to do. Worry because I don’t want to stare at the mirror feeling 31 but looking 51? Thinking, feeling and looking young matters to me. Worry because I don’t want to experience chronic degenerative aches and pains? Worry because sometimes I see myself in some of my Patients, and they are in pain, suffering, alone in their fight with sickness and anxiety. Worry because I don’t want restrictions to my untamed mind and heart. Freedom and Adventures matters to me.

As I got older, I cared less of my fears and tried the unimaginable. Younger, I was scared of heights. Ferris Wheel brings butterflies in my tummy. The past few years, it’s walking on side of cliffs, ravines and riding thrill rides. Anything to feel alive and excited.
He walked near the tip like it was nothing. I followed, but my feet were unsteady from the strong winds. After a quick picture, I backed out. I was being smart and cautious this time. It felt unsafe.

This is me being honest on my Birthday and reflecting on my fears and troubled heart. This is me doing what matters to me, time and moments with Family and some quiet time for myself. No parties. Just lots of outdoors, mindfulness and Roadtrip Adventures.

Swanton Berry Farm is our must stop for the best Homemade Organic Sweetest Blueberry Pie and Hot Apple Strawberry Cider. $7 a piece seems expensive but it’s worth the delight in one’s mouth. It’s my Birthday, so I asked for the entire pie which turned out cheaper considering how many slices I ate. I had 3. All that sugar, had to walk it off.

“51 candles are too much, one candle is enough as long as it’s lit with genuine, unconditional Love.”

These are just one of the many gems that awaits anyone that seeks the many Adventures and Discoveries of Santa Cruz County. Everyone can choose their escape and getaway. Many beaches are free.

To all who shared the Heart and pieces of this blog, Thank You. I appreciate the time and thoughtfulness in each feedback and reply you’ve written. Thank you for the likes, the kind support and for sharing your side of life and adventures generously. You all make blogging an enriching journey and experience year after year.

“We bloom and whither, bloom and wither till we used the last borrowed seeds of life.” Last stop, Natural Bridges State Beach, Santa Cruz. I took a walk along West Cliff. Yellow flowers everywhere. I walked towards one of the rock edges and found a quiet place to sit down away from People. The World was all mine for a few minutes. These flowers sat next to me. It understood my heart without me speaking.
Not everyone gets to say goodbye. Often we’re busy being busy. Many won’t even have a chance to beg and bargain. Live while still alive. Never linger feeling dead while alive. We will never have enough of time that is just about us and all that we care in this World. Picture: Lilies on a pond that overflows into the Ocean. It’s sewage water that looks like a Waterfall from afar. Even with dirty water full of harmful chemicals, beautiful blooms grows. That’s hope. That’s miracle happening right before my eyes.
West Cliff close to Sunset. Few hours at the places I enjoy, experiencing what I love all over again with my Wife and Son. This is the celebration I want. It’s what makes me happy. It is my Birthday after all. No wishes. I want tomorrow to surprise me.

Son, being himself told his Mom, “Dad is old but he thinks young.” Should I be concerned I don’t feel my age? Is it reckless if I think I can be anything I want, do whatever I want, go wherever I want?” I would like to believe age is but a number and I get to control the narrative of the rest of my life starting today.

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Flu Season ends, BA.2 COVID Season Begins

Highest probability for clinical diagnosis of COVID is after the Flu Season. Both present with Flu-like symptoms. Take one from the equation, and what’s left is the all year round cause of cough, sore throat, runny nose, nasal congestion, shortness of breath, fever, body aches, body malaise, headache, fatigue, nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. Extra clue, loss of taste and smell. Though that is less common, if not rare with BA.2.

I don’t think so until it’s really explosive. People are really enjoying and appreciating their new found Freedom. Friends and I have been to a maskless Buffet Dinner twice. No one got sick yet. Planning our third. Everyone is going somewhere for Spring Break and Summer.

It makes sense to consider Flu-Like symptoms after Flu Season as COVID. Challenge is testing elusive BA.2 on time. Too soon, false negative. Not enough specimen swab surface contact, false negative. High degree of suspicion is key. If it manifest like COVID, treat it cautiously like it’s COVID.

Tunnel Vision Pandemic will get narrower as facts and important information for People to decide, choose and prepare are purposely skipped, hidden, omitted. And I’m not into conspiracy theories.

America Is Staring Down Its First So What? Wave – The Atlantic

So what? This is exactly the thinking and response of many.

First week of April, an uptick of Flu-like symptoms in the Bay Area. Difference, Patients presenting with mild symptoms are standing side by side with the non-sick individuals in Healthcare Facilities like the lobby, pharmacy, lab, x-ray, then outside settings from public transports to stores and restaurants. And since proper masking is optional, People are coughing and sneezing without masks in crowded spaces instantaneously dispersing the more transmissible infected droplets of the now dominant BA.2 Subvariant.

An interesting observation, most of the Flu-like presenting Patients have resulted negative for Influenza, COVID and RSV. Is BA.2 harder to detect than Alpha, Delta and Omicron? It appears to be.

Elusiveness, is this a new defense mechanism of the virus? Anything is possible with viral mutations.

Why experts are terrified of a human-made pandemic — and what we can do to stop it- Vox

COVID-19 is tainted with lies and cover ups starting from its origin in China, to its spread in the U.S., and other parts of the World. Speculation that it may have started in the lab as a Bioweapon will always remain open for debate and confirmation. Three years in the Pandemic and a 4th Dominant Mutation that spreads swiftly across the Planet is a no brainer assumption. Every year, Healthcare Workers renew their online education on Bioterrorism. If we can not spot what a Bioweapon is, then we don’t really understand what we are reading. We could be Smart Professionals and still not see the Truth even if we are seeing them almost everyday.


John Hopkins University COVID Data used by many News stations to update the Public relies on honest and timely data reporting. It is already seeing the effects of under reporting and no reporting. U.S. the only Country to officially treat Pandemic as Endemic will have the worst next surges for prematurely ending its Pandemic measures. Another first in the World. This time, many of us will never truly be ready.

I give it 4 more weeks before Public Health of several Counties will make a Public Warning of the increasing new case numbers and increasing hospitalizations. In places where Government Leaders are against COVID safety, restrictions and reporting, Surge warnings will be kept away from Public Knowledge. Public will not know they are already having a community outbreak.

Summer, COVID will be Hot and Widespread like Summer 2021. Difference however is that many people will choose all together to stop observing infection safety guidelines like testing, reporting and quarantine.

In the U.S., average of 500 a day COVID Deaths is the comfortable number. We settled for something other parts of the World considered horrible and unacceptable. We can’t sugar coat death, loss and grief when it happened to real people with real families. We can’t brag it’s a win when it’s an obvious failure.
April 4, 2022. We stopped tracking COVID Deaths since our self declared Endemic State. I don’t see this as normal when it’s preventable.

Crazy, weird and confusing rest of 2022? For sure. Fun? Always until it’s not. Memorable? Guaranteed!

(Reuters) -Current COVID-19 vaccines are not well-matched against the BA.2 sub-variant of Omicron, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration said on Wednesday, as its panel of outside experts meets to discuss changes to future booster doses.

Austin Nurse Friend asked my Wife, “How do we know we have BA.2?” Wife answered, “I don’t know.” I told me Wife “We wouldn’t know unless Public Health does DNA Sequencing, and this are only for those infected with COVID for the second or third time.”

U.S.A. has lagged in DNA Sequencing as compared to U.K. and will further lag as COVID becomes less of a priority and concern in the Country. For the time being, we are spreading BA.2 among each other clueless and blind.

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